Twisted winds blew as I find myself powerless within its current. It has been a rather spectacular year, from the lowest point to the highest peak, I came and I conquered. I lived many lives that could have possibly been me; all playing out simultaneously across a parallel timeline that exists only within my head. Living only fragmented thoughts of myself behind, in one reality I slew dragons while the other I'm a farmer. These fragmented memories cloud my ability to differentiate one from the other. If I should die, it probably wouldn't matter for there are infinite versions of me throughout the infinite realities.
It wasn't until only recently that I've come to realize I have been building my life upon a foundation of sand; to which is crumbling like the sand castle it should.
Your words, they hurt and destroyed my already fragmented soul. For when I look to you for comfort I got piercing arrows to my heart.You told me to pray so I prayed, but not for wealth; rather for your kindness and encouragement. However, I got only your look of disappointment and wrath.
I see the end, but I am delaying the imminent. The longer it lasts the harder it is to let go. However, I feel like I'm nearing the last of my strength to hold on. I can't seem to decide if I should be the one to rattle the snake's nest or be the one that gets bitten.
We barely speak, but when we do its usually because you need help or when we have an argument or when you are unhappy with me about something. The cracks that have long existed within our already crumbling foundation and now the thick walls that have surfaced between us. I am at a crossroad, undecided, sad and confused. You will be who you are, that I have already accepted. Which was why I have decided to change, however, I've realized only recently that I have never been truly happy. Perhaps neither one of us really did belong to each other. Or perhaps, I'm a terrible lover. Either way, I can't seem to see myself in any of your futures. Perhaps, this is really the end.
